My forays into the world of finance

I have invested years of my life in my studies of economics. Nevertheless, I have no idea about it. Accordingly, my excursions into the world of finance ended miserably.

When private pension insurance was in vogue, I also took out one. The main reason for this, however, was that the manager of my bank was a hottie and took part in the consultation meetings (therefore it took a few conversations until I was eventually convinced of the product...). When the lady changed jobs, I started reading the contract for my pension plan for the first time. After some calculations, I realized that I would have to reach a fairly high age for the payments I had made up to that point to even begin to pay off. Given my lifestyle at the time, this age seemed completely illusory. Since then, I have been trying to get out of this insurance contracy, but the terms and conditions have so far proved to be inexorable.

My other investments were not exactly a hit either: a securities fund promised double-digit returns in fancy brochures, but ultimately performed similarly to my savings book. Last but not least, I gave my remaining play money to an investment consulting firm that specialized in gold purchases. Nothing can go wrong with gold, I thought. I was taught otherwise, because in the end the consulting firm as a whole went bust - and with it my investment. Therefore, in view of the current discussion on the abolition of capital gains tax, I can only say this much: I am happy to pay capital gains tax, or would have been happy to pay it. Because that would mean that my capital would have yielded a return at some point, I suppose.

The latest trend now is cryptocurrency. For months, Youtube promotional videos have been appearing to me, featuring smart, well-dressed young gentlemen - I estimate them all to be in their early 20s, some possibly still living at home - telling me about limitless freedom and financial independence. These young gentlemen know how to get rich with crypto investments and now comes the best part: they are actually willing to share their knowledge with me! I really would not have suspected such an act of charity in the world of high finance!

Nevertheless, I have not yet got through to also partitcipate at the crypto boom, because history tells us a lot about similar booms hat all ended in despair. My favorite example is the tulip crisis in 17th century Holland, when a tulip bulb was considered as valuable as a family house. Eventually people came to their senses and the tulip market crashed. I will spare the gentle reader further excerpts from the man-made stock market crashes. Only so much: somehow history repeats itself again and again, is my impression. (Like a child who just doesn't want to realize that the hotplate is hot) But maybe I just don't understand enough about it.

But I was eventually lucky: at some point I did come across a worthwhile investment: attractive, promising and embodying the right ethical values. We're talking about me, of course 😊 Why didn't I notice this investment sooner, because on second thought it was here all along?? So I invested in myself a few years ago. I am not allowed to give any information about the yield and performance so far at this point. Banking secrecy, you know? 😊

But it gets even better: today I don't have to worry at all about where to invest my money. The strategy behind it is as simple as it is ingenious. And I am willing to share this strategy for free!: there is simply no money to invest! Today, I am in the fortunate position that my total revenues go towards rent, a few groceries and our two children. Consequently, I am free from all worries about performance and returns.

Life can be so carefree....

Smart ass-tips:
- If you don't understand anything about high finance, you and I are already 2. However, the following piece of literature helped me a lot to understand the connections: in the „Asterix“ comic "Obelix and Co ", the Romans buy tons of menhirs from the Gaul Obelix. No one knows what menhirs are for, especially not the Romans, who are eager to buy them. At the end of the story, the Gaulish village consists only of rich menhir suppliers, but both the menhirs and the currency sestertius are worth nothing.
- Invest in yourself. This is good because the only circumstance that affects the value of your investment is yourself.

Copyright: Paul Grohmann, 12.6.2022